We had lunch, it only lasted an hour.

He had called, said he was visiting some friends at my University. Did I want to meet for lunch?

I said yes, I hadn’t seen my cousin since Christmas. We were the same age in a big family. We had always remained close. I loved him, because he was family. I liked him, because he was my friend.

He picked me up as soon as he got to town, we went to a very hipster pub and ordered a flatbread pizza to share. He asked me how I was doing? I had sounded stressed when I called him a few days ago. How was school? Did I here about the latest family drama? Had I spoken to Grandma recently?

He told me little things, that there was a girl he liked, that his roommates were slobs. He loved the old couch my mother had given him, did I remember that couch? The one with the red check marks?

I told him I loved him and gave him hug. He did the same, dropped me off and then went back home.

Only afterward did it occur to me that he had not done anything else on his trip, he had made and excuse and driven two hours round trip to check on me.

He will never know that his visit, reminded me that I had people in my life that cared about me. That he gave me enough of a reason to find help. I made an appointment to talk to a counselor that day.

What do you do when you have no idea where your life is going?

If you have the answer, let me know.

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